Lordy, this post is so not optimized for search. I’ll do that later. For now, I wanted a handy place to send you when you share my reading taste and ask for a book recommendation. I’ve finally nailed down my favorite genre — the sweeping, multi-decade epic novel. I often search using the term: “Unputdownable […]
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How I Use ChatGPT as My Editor (Without Letting It Mangle My Voice)
Wait, does Laura Belgray use ChatGPT??? If you’ve seen me ranting about ChatGPT’s grating tics and how dispiriting it is to read something it obviously wrote, you might be surprised by how much I use it. While I never, ever use it to write something for me, because a) I don’t want to skip the […]
KEEP READINGThe Million-Dollar Email List: How To Build An Engaged Subscriber List From Scratch—Without Facebook Ads, Instagram Ads, Or Giving A Dime To Zuck
“How big is Talking Shrimp’s email list?” Oh my, aren’t you forward! That’s quite the personal question. When you ask, what you’re probably also wondering is: “What’s a good email list size?” I’m happy to answer both questions, the best I can. So, not to brag, but around town, I’m kinda known for my list […]
KEEP READINGHow to come up with email subject lines people click
By Laura Belgray How do you come up with email subject lines people click? is a question I get ALL. THE. TIME. 2 methods to come up with subject lines that make your emails irresistible How to bank the email subject lines you come up with for later How do you come up with email […]
KEEP READINGDo we believe in “manifesting”? (The Woo-Adjacent Manifesto)
One of my most popular emails was one where I wrote about hiding my “woo” side from my husband. (Subject line: Don’t tell my husband.) I’m not a true woo-woo type. You’ll never hear me say I’m on a “spiritual quest” or call myself a “seeker.” I won’t give you my “favorite manifesting crystal” for […]
KEEP READINGShrimpmukkah! A 2020 roundup of must-have opt-in freebies from Shrimp Club superstars
Interested in the most recent Shrimpmukkah Freebies? Check out the list from 2024 here. Happy seasons! There are plenty of gift-buying guides out there. I thought I’d add one that’s a gift-getting guide. Free gifts, for you. All they cost is your email address. Whether you’re shopping for help with: Segues (that bridge in your email […]
KEEP READINGWhere were you that day?
For months after September 11th, strangers in New York talked to each other. If you were in a restaurant or a doctor’s waiting room or on the subway, you’d inevitably overhear someone talking about the attack. And you’d join in. You’d ask where they were that day, and tell them where you were. The people […]
KEEP READINGWithout free samples, I’m nobody (and 6 other truths I’ve discovered since getting a plastic mouth)
Do you think a lot about your mouth? If not, lucky you! Not thinking about your mouth is a luxury you need to start appreciating right now. Light a scented candle and write about it in your gratitude journal. I think about my mouth all day. Everywhere I go, there it is — stealing the […]
KEEP READINGPhilanthropy Accounting For Stripper-Loving Dummies
In the morning, I like to listen to hip hop radio on my iPhone. I have an app which lets me tune in to any station around the country, though no matter how much I switch around, all I hear is the same Drake song and idiotic morning-show talk. Today on the Orlando station “Wild 94.1” I heard the […]
KEEP READING5 Married-People Arguments We’ll Have Till The End Of Time
Someone place the 911 call now. Winter is coming, and for me and Steven, it brings our worst domestic dispute. OK, make it 311. It won’t come to blows, and calling 911 for non-emergencies really pisses them off. I know, because I once called the fire department when I was worried about tree branches that were growing […]
KEEP READINGThings I’m totally going to take back.
My tote bag – the dirty, faded Talking Shrimp one that I use for walks, as opposed to the nicer one I use for going out – has in it: My bulging wallet, An almost-empty Poland Springs water bottle (one last emergency sip, worth keeping) My iPhone earbuds A bunch of loose, long-ass, drugstore receipts, […]
KEEP READINGGetting married is “easy”? I can’t be friends with this person.
This weekend, the NY Times ran an opinion piece by Elizabeth Wurtzel called Getting Married Is Easy: Why I Will Be Wed. If you don’t know, Elizabeth Wurtzel was the literary It Girl in the 90s, when she wrote a hot-topic book called Prozac Nation. I didn’t read it because she annoyed me just by appearing all over the […]
KEEP READINGYou will wear diaper pants.
Last night at dinner, I asked Steven if we’d both end up wearing those diaper pants. “Yeah, probably,” he said without much thought. “And I know I can’t convince you, but I think we should live in the country somewhere and have a car that lowers so it’s easy to get into. The city’s just tough […]
KEEP READINGWhere were you that day? (An encore post)
[UPDATE: I keep updating this post because every time I look back at it, the intro has already become dated. I don’t have kids, but I can say of the world: it grows up so fast! Or regresses. Either way, it changes. And some of my readers weren’t even born when this all happened. (My […]
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